Saturday, 31 March 2012


I have been listening to shouting and musing on the  fact that no one argues by listening, it's just a fight to have the loudest voice, the most vehement point, the most stubborn will.
It's a shame really, because nothing actually gets said if no one hears it.
I have spent the week happy, walking late into the evening and curling up safe each night.
We watched the DVD of Fiddler on the Roof from November and laughed (I nearly cried) at how funny it was. And I was reminded how talented an actor Thomas is, too. We gave blood, which was the first time for me, and somewhat spontaneous, but I surprised myself by being absolutely fine. It felt good to give something back, too. We sat on Thomas's patio and ate vegetarian Lasagna in the sun. 
(If I move, my laptop cable pulls the filter out of the fish tank and there is silence)
I have been a little afraid of the future recently, and I realised how much I am banking on liking Edinburgh when I go to see it on Wednesday. If I have to live there for four years, I want to like it a whole lot. I am looking forward to seeing the other side of me (my Scottish family) in their home ground for the first time since I was quite little, including cousins who I last saw aged sixteen and who are now getting speeding fines and crashing cars and stuff like that. I hope everyone gets along well.
I think I will be clinging to my lover's hand as I drag him around Edinburgh and I'll do that thing I always do where I point out everything I know something about as if I know the city (I don't).
I will take lots of pictures.

(these are from my week)


the veg garden in preparation

Thomas, going walking

a local cat

red wine on the swing

me and glasses, taken by Thomas
a rare photograph I like of me
and spring brings out even more freckles, which scarcely seemed possible a few weeks ago

Thomas and Sadie's games
I'm not sure who was victorious
apart from the fact that Sadie managed to chew a ball into two pieces
and slobber all over us
and we still didn't manage to tire her out (I say 'we' but Thomas deserves full credit, I was lazy and took pictures from the wooden swing)

and then last night I went walking with mum and Sadie: 

Tonight I took self portraits, and hated them in camera, but managed to rescue a few: